ADHD Symptoms in Men & Teens (Without ADHD Testing) - Pt 1
*In Part 2 we cover ADHD treatment without meds. In Part 3 we cover ADHD treatment with medications.
The Level 1 Gamer never seems to get anything done. People always call him lazy and tell him to try harder. He often misses appointments and work deadlines, which makes people mad at him. He’ll buy a bunch of stuff on Steam or Playstation sales he never uses. He tells himself he’ll stay away from porn or junk food but before he knows it he’s back. He can barely focus during school or a project, and often misses important deadlines. He ruins his future potential because he has no idea about his ADHD or getting it fixed.
The Level 100 Gamer knows he has ADHD but he’s been diagnosed and treated. People comment how amazing he is at getting work done. He never misses appointments or deadlines. He works for hours on his school, job or business without getting distracted. He’s mastered how to be successful in his life with his ADHD.
I used to be one of those people who thought ADHD was overhyped or an excuse diagnosis people use to be lazy. I worked a side gig for a prison, and a lot of inmates told me as kids they either were treated for ADHD, or their doctors thought they had ADHD but their parents didn’t want treatment. I thought they were just drug-seeking (very common in that population), but I kept seeing that pattern over and over again. Then in my residency I saw many kids and teens with clear signs of ADHD. Many got better with treatment, but a lot didn’t get treated because parents didn’t want to. And so these impulsive kids, what did they do? They often entered drugs, casual sex, obsessive gaming, risky tattoos etc. But they often just went under the radar, underperforming in their classes. Then they don’t get into the college they want, don’t get the job or promotion they want etc. They develop self-confidence issues, become sensitive to criticism which can lead to anxiety or depression. Basically, they don’t meet their potential. That was a wake-up call for me.
Missed diagnosis
A lot of teens never get diagnosed or treated for ADHD, which affects their success later in their life
So I did a huge deep dive into ADHD, understanding its symptoms, why we have it, and the treatments. And I’ll break them down for you in a no-BS way.
ADHD is one of those things we hear about all the time, but most people don’t really understand it. They think its not real, we’re just making excuses. It’s even harder to get treated for it as an adult because providers always think we just want Adderall. We could’ve been doing terrible in school but our parents didn’t want us to get treated cause “my kid’s not going on meds.”
It sucks cause our life could’ve been falling apart for years without knowing why.
We can’t focus at school or work so we get shit grades or get fired. We keep losing our keys so we miss appointments or plans with friends. Our friends or girlfriends get mad for us interrupting them constantly so they stop talking to us. We binge eat snacks and now we hate how we look. Our parents don’t believe its real so we don’t get treated. School is way harder for us than other kids, and we have a lot of parental pressure. Or we were smart enough to overcome this stuff until now.
ADHD is a disorder of executive dysfunction.
Basically it’s harder for us to do the high-level brain stuff that separates humans from animals (critical thinking, focused work, rational decisions etc.).
The short explanation is our norepinephrine and dopamine levels are off in our prefrontal cortex (front of the brain). This makes electric signals travel crappier in that area. The communication between different brain areas gets affected, such as the part of the brain that has impulses and the part that resists them. Any deeper is neuroscience stuff only nerds like me need to know. But for you, a few things happen cause of this:
It’s way harder for us to pay attention to what we need, or we can’t pay attention when there’s a bunch happening around us
It’s hard to sit calmly without moving
Its harder for us to resist impulses to highly pleasurable things, and they feel way better than they do for the average person
Adults with missed ADHD diagnoses can struggle at work and miss job opportunities and promotions
ADHD has real consequences in our lives if its not recognized. So let’s do that. ADHD is divided into 2 categories: inattentive and hyperactive/impulsive.
Here’s the signs for Inattentive ADHD:
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We make enough small mistakes that call us lazy or stupid. We miss details on tests, in code, on homework or work projects that seem so obvious later on.
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It’s hard for us to stay focused in lectures, meetings, work projects, schoolwork, tests. We often lose our place, or forget the immediate thought we had. Stuff that takes others 15 min might take us an hour.
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Coworkers, classmates, teachers, bosses, friends or partners think we’re ignoring them. They say we’re distracted or it looks like we’re daydreaming. They could call our name and we miss it.
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People get mad because we leave stuff incomplete without realizing. Or we don’t finish what we started. They often tell us to pay more attention. We think we finished something and then see we left something obvious.
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People say we’re messy, our work is a mess, our desk or room is a mess. We miss appointments. We could sit down and spend hours on something. We get lost when someone gives us directions or a series of steps to follow. It’s hard to keep track of things.
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We avoid anything that will be mentally tough or take a lot of time. Papers, long works, essays, work projects, reading, studying, errands etc.
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We frequently misplace or lose our school notes, wallet, keys, laptop, phone, charger, controllers, ipad, headset etc.
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We look up at any noise, person passing us by, door opening, object dropping, phone notification, noise in-game etc
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We forget chores, errands, paying bills, returning calls or texts, turning lights/stove off, feeding our pets, picking up the groceries etc.
Here’s the signs for Hyperactive/Impulsive ADHD:
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We constantly fidget, squirm, or tap while seated.
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We keep getting up when sitting is expected like in class, at work, in meetings, at dinner, when doing homework, tests, or work projects.
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We always feel like we have to move.
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People always say we’re loud. It’s really hard for us to stay quiet.
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People always say we’re moving, its hard to keep up with us. We may walk very quickly, talk animated with our hands and big gestures.
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People say we interrupt them a lot, they say we talk a lot, or need to slow down. They zone out cause we’re just talking and talking.
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It’s hard to wait our turn in conversation, we interrupt others without realizing. We can jump at answering questions before they’re completed.
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It’s hard to wait when we’re in line for something, at the doctor’s office, waiting for grades or answers to come back, waiting for a game to release etc.
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We butt into conversations or jump into other people’s activities. People say we’ve used their stuff or crossed their personal space without permission.
Typically a person must meet 6 criteria in either category, plus have the symptoms from a young age to get the diagnosis. However in real life I believe its a spectrum, and it looks different for everyone.
My rule of thumb: if it affects our daily functioning, its a problem.
If you’re reading this and it sounds like you or your son, you’re not alone. ADHD is very common and underrecognized. Untreated it can lose us real school, career and social opportunities. It sucks. But at the same time, we can’t make an excuse for it. Any problem we have, we take the actions to fix it.
It takes a full psychiatric evaluation by a highly trained mental health clinician to assess for ADHD. I’m a psychiatrist who’s mission is to help gamers beat their loneliness by fixing their mental health. I specialize in treating gamers with depression, anxiety, ADHD and video game addiction. If you want to get assessed for ADHD, CLICK HERE to book your free consult call.
Check out our MEDIA page for more content like this.
Remember, real life is the video game.
So let’s level up.
Agam
